Maybe dad shouldn't watch this

Jennifer and I were watching Taken last night, and about 30 minutes in, just after the daughter gets kidnapped by Albanian white slave traders, I turned to her and surmised: "maybe your dad shouldn't watch this."

We had been in a tug and pull for months about Jennifer going with her French class to Paris 2 years from now. Gary at first said no, but then relented if I went with her as a parent chaperon. Jennifer's not happy with that plan.

But after watching said daughter in Taken get snatched from a Paris apt, I quickly started the movie after that, when Liam N. goes after daughter with a vengeance and kills everyone (I think I stopped counting bodies at 20) in his way. But they were Albanian slavers, so who cares?

They just disappear

That was the comment as I dropped by daughter off at Auburn High School today.

Yesterday, I could tell she was shaken up, as an AHS student was killed in a headon collision. A friend of hers survived the crash.

But instead of watching American Idol last night (her dad and I ended up watching it and booing when Adam wasn't picked) she disappeared back in her room, and texted her friends, talking about Andrew and Darius.

"Mom," she said before I let her out for school. "They just disappear" when they're dead.

A boy from Auburn High School died last night

Car was going to fast, he may have been high, prob. not wearing a seat belt.

Andrew was known as a partier, apparently. His parents had kicked him out of the house for it. However, when they made the announcement over the loud speaker today, a girl in Jennifer's class - an ex-girlfriend of his, broke down and began sobbing.

Jennifer was just relieved that the passenger, Darius, who she did know well, survived...apparently because he was asleep.

"Maybe this will teach him NOT to party so much," Jennifer said.

I clucked sympathetically and then stressed again- if you're at a party or place and the ride home looks iffy (as in drunk or high) call us, day or night. No questions asked.

And it had me thinking again. Babies-you worry about crib death Toddlers-choking Elementary-bullies and getting snatched. Now she's a teen. Thankfully on a good path, not pregnant, doing well in school, good friends. I'm actually relieved she'll be able to drive next fall, relieving me of 10 years of pick-up-drop-off duty. And yet.

As Andrew (the kid who died) drilled home, foolish choices behind the wheel (I think he was street racing to impress a girl) can snatch all this away in an instant.

Health class, part II

After they put together the sexual organs, the class moved on today to who was the strongest -men or women.

It seems the teacher told the girls next time the guy bragged that he was big and tough, point to the area of the uterus and note that that's considered one of the strongest muscles in the body.

Apprently this health class conversation continued at the local coffee shop after school, where J decided to torture her b-friend with pictures and articles from "Glamour."

There were articles on sexual disfunction, and wild sexual poses, which J of course had to describe in detail to her best friend and her long suffering boyfriend.

"You didn't do this out loud did you," I squeaked. "The owner will kick you out!"

Okay, okay mom, we'll keep it down next time.

I"ll have to quickly buy a $50 punch card at the coffee store to make sure there is a next time.

Please mommy please

Actually, this plea came two times in the last 24 hours and I said no to both.

One was greeted with a glare, the other with a sigh.

The first came on Sunday when Jennifer, after returning home for a sleepover, decided she wanted to spend the day out at Lief, her sort of boyfriend's house.

"Wasn't this the guy whose mom works 24-7 and wanted to spend some time with her son," I asked.

"yeah, but he asked, and she said it was okay"

More like she was badgered and she finally gave in.

So I and J's dad said no. Actually Gary got to be the bad guy first, and when J got home from said sleepover, she simply stomped into the house and marched to her room.

The second time was this morning, when Jennifer wanted to play hookie and go back to bed. I was sorely tempted, but given it's a crowded Monday, no I couldn't.

She just signed and continued to slick on her mascara.

Oh, and a big butt is a good thing

After Leif got out the car, J. tried to make ammends on the remark she made this weekend.

"All guys like big butts, really it's a good thing"

Tell me that again when I hit size 9 again.

So how do you put this vagina together?

Jennifer was babbling on about her Shakespeare class, and whether I could help her find 2 dream squences (that's what spark notes are for, dearie) when she swithed to health.

OMG, she said, they gave us the parts for a vagina and a penis, and of course Lief (her b-friend at the moment) was in her group, and then they had to assemble said body parts.

"I had no idea there were so many parts of a vagina!" she said.

Neither do most men darl'n.

But apparently Leif was a snap at putting together both parts (hmmm) and was able to answer all the questions about STD's in a snap.

"I was a genius at this," he bragged, as I'm taking him home in the car today.

I wasn't going to go there. I just pretended I hadn't heard.