Not with my daughter you don't

Jennifer was curled up next to me in tears, telling me about her boyfriend's friends (now x-friends) who were texting her nasty things, saying she was dominating all his time (not true) and it was her fault that he was now living in a group home for foster kids (um, not true again).

When she told me that one of them called her the c-word, that was the last straw. I brought in the big guns, i.e. gary. Said hubby promptly texted back all the perpetrators (who live in the same foster home Adam lived in) and blocked their # to text Jennifer. And he said if they tried it again, through another phone #, he'd call the cops.

I dont' think it dawns on these kids, that mess with Jennifer, you mess with 2 angry bears. That hasn't been their experience in their lives,but I think they know it's part of Jennifer's reality. Mess with her, you mess with all of us.

And adam has crossed said "friends" off the bff list.

Watch your back

Not exactly the greeting or goodbye I usually send my daughter off to school with, as she hops out of the car, checks her makeup one last time and makes sure she has her cell phone on her.

This odd farewell for the day came after she got into yet another "she texted, and she texted" fight with another girl. And then a third girl jumped in (who was not close friends with either my daughter or my daughter's friend) to add her two cents. Don't ask me to explain the entire story, because frankly, I lose the thread (texted or otherwise) every time she tells it to me.

Long text short, this girl ended up texting Jennifer that the world would be a better place w/o her and encouraged some of her friends to stalk Jennifer. OK, all of my hubby's (and mine) protective juices just went into overdrive. So on her own, Jennifer when with her boyfriend to the vp of the school, who looked at the texts, which Jennifer saved and promptly suspended the girl for four days. Her parents also were upset and took away her texting plan.

Fine, but when she gets back in school later this week, I've told her b-friend, Adam, to have my daughter's back. He's a wrestler, and while I don't expect him to slap the girl down to the pavement, I consider him deterrent to any ideas this girl may have for revenge.

My hubby also called the vp today, and the vp doesn't think there will be any retaliation. I'm not sure I agree with him

Boys suck, Part XXI

A tearful call about 4 pm.

"Mom, could you come get me, I've had an awful day."

Turns out, BF Lief dumped her. For about the 3rd time (I've lost count).

At any rate, she was moping, texting and studying in the bathroom (sez that's the place that she can think) for the rest of the evening.

About 10 pm, I was finishing up reading when I heard a small sniffle from the hall. So I decided to do the mom thing and see what was going on, wherein, she started sobbing in the bathroom.

"I just don't know why this always happens to me," she wailed.

Well, it happens to every girl, but when it happens to you, it feels like you're walking around with a big "dumped" sign flashing over your head.

And guys are intimidated by her - her strong personality and good looks make for a fierce combo. So sometimes I just think they dump before she gets tired of them.

But last night, laying on the spare room bed (where I had retreated when Gary snored me out of the bedroom again), with the cat kneeding at her feet, she cried, talked railed against guys and listened. This went on for about an hour, but I figured, how often does she turn to me? All her friends she usually would have cried with were asleep already.

And it didn't help when dad, frustrated his daughter was upsent, threatened to ground her if she texted this idiot again. Um, not the best move right this very minute dad.

Anyway, the day (night?) finally lightened when a former b-friend caught wind through text-ville that Jennifer was available again. He texted this morning. Things are brighter now.

Boys are stupid, Part XX

Jennifer had been fuming around the house of late, and so I took a deep breath and asked her what was bothering her - always an iffy task with a 16 year old.

"Boys...are...just...so....stupid," she fumed as she furiously slammed something into her phone text pad.

"I mean, you tell them you don't want to talk to them, and what do they do, THEY DON'T TALK OR TEXT YOU!" she said, almost shouting by now. Her dad takes a quick peek from the TV room, assesses the situation and then ducks out of sight.

"ANYONE, I MEAN ANYONE WITH BRAINS, would ask you what was wrong and try to fix it," she said, calming down a bit now.

She and her sometimes b-friend Leif had been texting...or not... most of the day. He hadn't texted her for a day, and then texted back, after she asked him where he was all day, that he was too busy to text and not to get her panties in a bunch about it.

Not a very wise move, especially when you've texted said girl's best friend during the same time you were supposedly too busy to text.

Guys never seem to get that girls talk.

"And it just doesn't get me about the texting and talking. They don't show their emotions, they dont' realize that it doesn't take much to patch things up, a word or a flower and they never can admit their wrong."

Well, says I, I'm not sure how much of that is going to get better as they grow older. Some, but not all.

But texting your BF when he doesn't text you, yeah, stupid.

Touch phones

Gary and Jennifer were busy arguing over which new upgrade to get on the I-phones last night. She actually had poached the upgrade I was supposed to get,and transferred it to her phone. Thanks. What if I want apps someday?

But transfer she did, and now she has a phone that can have apps (she'll have to pay for them out of her allowance) and pay an extra $20 for the upgraded phone, which still has keyboard for her texting fetish.

However, surprisingly, she's getting tired of texting, she said. She just likes talking on the phone now.

Could so see my daughter doing this

CNET reported yesterday that a teen girl walked right in, and down, a manhole, while she was trying to text (no reports if she texted for help once she was 4-feet-under, sharing the sewer with the rats.

Can totally see Jennifer doing this, as she's texting in the car, while watching tv, sometimes at dinner, definitely while putting her makeup on. The only place she doesn't text is in the shower, for obv. reasons, although I think if she could figure out a way to do so, she would. She does keep her phone on the towel so when it buzzes she can hear it, and it doesn't vibrate its way onto the floor.

I can also see my hubby doing this, as he's become addicted to his blackberry. So sometimes I"ll be watching tv, and the texting clicks are coming in stereo.

Do teenagers use twitter?

Apparently not, according to this article.

However, I would argue, after watching my daughter text, pretty much non-stop, all day long for 2 weeks while I've been home on vacation, that they twitter all the time. It's just called texting in their world.

And when she gets on my case about being on twitter, facebook or e-mail, I shoot back that observation, saying that in essence, twitter is a grownup texting, since I can't stand texting on my phone.

She usually just scowls and goes back to texting.

What did you just text?

That was what Jennifer was trying NOT to scream after her cousin (2 years older than her) snatched her cell phone after she took his.

So JJ started texting away, telling this one boy that Jennifer's had her eye on (won't admit it, and no it's not the one we made cookies for at 9pm) that she loved him.

Silence from the other end.

So Jennifer retaliated and texted the same thing to one of JJ's male friends.

Answer back: WTF dude?

JJ quickly rectified the situation, but Jennifer didn't here back from her guy for days.

He's the preening type, so I'm sure that he's thinking about whether Jennifer is telling the truth..or not.

Great love scenes if there were texting

Frankly, many of them prob. would have never occurred.

Romeo and Juliet?

ROMEO, IDIOT, SHE'S JUST ZZZZing. UR PRST.

Anthony and Cleo

CLEO, IDIOT, HE"S NOT DEAD

And then there's Scarlett and Rhett

FRNKLY, SCRLT, DNT GV A DAMN.

Doesn't quite have the same snap.

I'm certainly glad texting wasn't around when I was dating, or I probably would have gotten dumped much more than I did.

But J. dusted herself off over the weekend, and headed into school a bit late, due to a "stomachache" she swore had nothing to do with her ex b-friend, and marched off to class. I think her pack of g-friends, all saying he was a douch bag helped her spirits. And guys now lining up to ask them out.

The headache for me is vetting them all over again.

Having a text-free dinner

It actually happened last night, as my daughter's cell phone ran out of juice. Suddenly, she wasn't hunger and wanted to be dropped off back home. Then the real reason comes out. Her cell phone is dead and she can't text during dinner like she usually does.

Gary take advantage of the fact he's driving, we're already on the way to the restaurant - the golden steer, so we're all in jeans - and says "no way." She's just going to have to, gasp, talk to us.

After much grumbling and pleading, she gives up, but swears she wont' share any of her dinner with us. She orders an entire prime rib dinner, and ends up eating most of it. And yes, she actually does talk to us this time.

Homecoming? Can I go?

Those were the first words out of Jennifer's mouth yesterday as I picked her up from v-ball practice.

"Well, someone's asked you, I assume?"

Well, no. Not yet, anyway.

Apparently Edward had text'd (word?) one of her bf's to see if she knew whether if asked, Jennifer would say yes. Which of course she would. But I'm not sure if that message got back to her or Edward.

Anyway, now she wants a dress, a silver one please, for when Edward does get around to asking.

At this point, I had to start talking about ground rules:

We have to meet the boy first.

No going as a group date with other teens, the driver of which just turned 17.

And if the parents drive (and we don't), we have to meet them too, or at least have a phone conversation.

Jennifer rolled her eyes, but she agreed. If only to get a shot at that silver dress.

She forces me to text. I force her to boil water.

I guess in her world, I'M learning how to boil water.

My daughter, fed up with text stupidity, finally insisted I send my own wildlife photos to my other blog. She simply won't do it anymore. Fine. So she shows me how, quickly punching in the e-mail address, in fact so quickly her movements are a blur.

Uhm. How do I get the @ again? Mom, weren't you watching! Fine. So slowly, taking three times as long, I send over three photos.

Then she wants a noodle dinner, a fav of hers when she can't think of anything else to eat. It involves boiling water and dumping in pasta. Guess what she was doing tonight?

Yep, I've Seen Text-Speak In Her Papers; And As For the WASL, Who Are They Kidding?

This is an interesting New York Times article on text-language showing up in formal papers kids turn into school.

Well, I can attest to that. J., knowing my background as a journalist, will always have me proof her work. And lo' and behold, if it's not an actual misspelling, it's something like "R U going...." Yeah, that's going to get by Mr. Heinen with flying colors.

Also, she's relieved. She took her last WASL test until the big one in 10th grade yesterday. I asked her if she wanted to take it early in 9th grade, just to be done with it and it was like I had just suggested that she poke herself with a hot needle. Okay, never mind.

But if anyone thinks those kids don't discuss the test with each other, with their friends, grandparents or parents, well, they do. I have a force and energy question (something to do with a pipe) that I've pretty much memorized right now, due to the fact J. repeated it so many times to see if she'd gotten the right answer (yeah, I have a biology degree too, so I get the science questions as well.)

Texting does have its uses

Especially when it comes to comforting friends.

J was practically glued to her phone yesterday and today,until I finally asked her what all that furious texting was about (I assumed it was about Jimmy.) It was not. It was about Elliott, a friend of Jimmy's who is now in the hospital with what sounds like bone cancer.

He was bored between chemo sessions, I guess, and wanting to talk with friends. So, he did. Okay, I saved my "aren't you texting too much" lecture until later. I asked if she wanted to swing by the hospital to say hello, but she said that would be weird, he'd feel weird, so no. She'd rather text, and he'd rather receive them than let's say, balloons.

OMG, B4YKI she broke up in IM world, ignored my .02

I should have known that despite my sage advice, this was going to happen.

Today, my daughter decided to go for the "single life" as she put it, and broke up through e-mail with her long term boyfriend of all of three months (which, she hastily reminds me, is three times the duration of my first relationship)

She said that he was okay with it. Which I guess, in truth, he was, since he promptly texted his BF and said he was single again, "let's go party!" Now, said best friend passed this around his friends, and it ended up back in J.'s IM box. She promptly labeled him a douche bag and IM'd all her friends.

Okay, well that was quick. And I guess no x-mas present from Jim.

@TEOTD, You knew she was going to ditch my 411 and B4YKI, be single again. (To translate this, go here.)

No texting at the table, please

We're at the Metropolitan Grill in Seattle, busy waiting for our appetizer and going over the menu, which starts at $25 a plate, salad extra.

It's our traditional "treat ourselves for the holidays" and we've decided to do it big as family, with dinner and then go see Jersey Boys. Both my husband and I look up and there is J., head down, texting her friends.

"Common, J.," Gary says, "turn that off. You're at the table now. It's family time."

Insert glare here.

"Dad, you two are boring, and I'm just talking to my friends," she said.

"You don't see mom and I with our cell phones at the plate do you?" he countered. "Turn it off."

Reluctantly she complied, but not before she took a picture of the $225 martini on the menu (had gold flakes on the rim) and sent it to all her friends, with an explainer. Another excuse to text no doubt, and to add that she was being forced to sign off, and her parents were LMO.