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Thursday, April 30, 2009

I'm glad she has a pretty high opinion of herself

Especially as she tells me she doesn't understand HOW any girl would let any guy or man abuse or scream at her, and just take it.

Apparently outside of highschool, a guy was doing just that today, and the girlfriend, J. says, was just standing there, with tears in her eyes, taking it.

"I would tell him to go fuck himself," she said calmly.

To wit, I agreed.

I told her that the girl taking it may stem from the soggy potato syndrome-i.e. any affection is better (even from an abusive b-friend) than no affection at all, esp. if she's not getting any at home.

And it doesn't have to be actual physical abuse, but the emotional abuse this girl was putting up with. I once had a major relationship, just before my hubby, where the guy would pick fights and then scream at me. When I tried to leave, he threw a painting at me, and then screamed that he'd read my diary (foolishly left on his couch) and couldn't understand why I was afraid of him.

Yeah, right, let me know when you figure that out.

I told J. this story, and told her, don't put up with this type of abuse either.

"You should have told him to go fuck himself," she said before turning back to texting.

Again, sound advice.

My officer worker isn't very happy with me.

My my daughter's advice-nurture my inner bitch, she said. Remember, it's more important for people to respect you, than like you.

You know, that's not bad advice.

Swine flu at school

Well, she's healthy. And i'm arming her with hand sanitizer tomorrow. And she already caughts into her sleave. Soo, I guess she's going to be okay. There were a few kids walking around in face masks today, but most of the kids seem to be joking about it.

Frankly, I hope it stays that way.

Monday, April 27, 2009

No more dirty dancing for you

First I learned after J. returned from the tolo on Sat. night, that half those who attended the dance had been kicked out after "dirty dancing" (you remember , at least I do, 30 years ago, grinding crotches together). Well, the new generation has discovered it with glee.

Fortunately J doesn't like it, so she avoids it, unless she's doing it with other girls. (some relief from mom in this at least).

But now, since SO many kids got kicked out, the principal at her high school has cancelled all but 2 dances next year (the senior prom and the homecoming dance).

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Mom, I look like a poodle!

That's basically what my daughter was crying to me after she came out of the hair salon today, 3.5 hours before tolo-which I'm glad only come once a year.

Her usual hair dresser wasn't there, so when it came time at Hair Masters to get someone to give her long flowing locks some curls, someone else had to step in. And that person, who was very nice, insisted on giving her long Suellen (think GWTW ringlets) with the assurances that things would calm down before the dance (title beauty and the geek).

This southern belle wasn't buying it. And immediately started pulling at the curls to get them to relax. She did find some sparkles for her hair and a silver clutch, but this tolo turned out to be more expensive than I thought. $40 for the hair, $25 for the dress, $25 for the shoes, $60 for the dinner, and $40 for various odds and ends. Ouch. some she paid for (like the hair) some she did.

I just asked gary if the hair had relaxed from its southern belle look at 6 pm tonight. HE just told me no. That means at midnight, we'll see if she's happy about how things turned out or not.

Friday, April 24, 2009

I get my evil strain from you

This is what my daughter said after we spent some time coming up with plots to terrorize our new next door neighbor, who moved in about 8 mo ago, with her ex, and decided to redo him, his house and his yard. And to do so, she put up a fence between the yard (hadn't been one in 20 years, because said neighbor was never in it. He was golfing.)

Anyway, after the spat over the fence and having it torn down and letting my dog run free w/o telling me said front gate was coming down, we haven't spoken since.

But she has done a great job on the front yard, and now tulips are blooming in perfect little groups all around nicely trimmed gardens. She's pulled out all the dandelions, which had populated our front yard (and back) with a yearly crop of dandelions for years.

I mulled over taking out the bulbs, one by one and replanting the in our yard. Jennifer immediately perked up.

We laughed. Unf. I just don't have the nerve. And I'm afraid of karma.

Wishes and dreams

The did an interesting assignment in Jennifer's health class-lists of four.

Four people she loves dearly (yes, I made the list)
Me, her dad, Uncle George in California and her grandma louise in Everett.

Four dreams
To find true love, to live in a house with a wraparound porch, with a bit of tara thrown in, near the beach and to become a biologist.

Four things she values
Her dog, ginger, oldest cat, her photo album and a quilt her grandma Alice (now passed) made her.

Four things she likes.
Cheery blossoms, ocean, her room...and I can't remember the last one.

Gossip Girl

WTF, Jennifer... WTF!!!!

I wish I was saying what the heck..but I wasn't. I had just picked up my daughter from school, who announced she hadn't had the best of days.

So, I prompted, what happened?

"Well, this one boy said I'd given a blow job to my old b-friend (I hadn't), and this other boy is spreading the rumor that I want to sleep with him (I don't),and this other girl is still saying I have bad teeth, but that's losing steam. Typical gossip in high school."

That's where I started my rant, having visions of tracking down blow-job boy, who'd made this announcement in front of a parent I know, and slamming his head against the wall until he passed out.

"Mom, calm down," she said. Insert eye roll here. "This boy sez everyone's giving everyone blow jobs, so no one pays attention to him, and (the ex b-friend) denied it. As for G. he says every girl wants to sleep with him, so no one listens to him either. And as for my teeth, all they have to do is look at 'em."


"Didn't they gossip in your school..this will blow over by tomorrow and move on to someone else," she said sagely.

And by the next day, it had to some other poor soul.

In my day (yes 30 years ago), yes we did gossip, tho I can't remember blow jobs coming up in the conversation. In truth, I'm not sure I heard the term until college. We were just wondering which cheerleader was sleeping with which jock. I think we still used the terms 1st, 2nd and 3rd base.

And I was lower down the food chain than my daughter is. No one took much notice of this skinny girl from South Everett. Thankfully.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009


Yes, it's just dawned on my daughter that she must pay for the date this Sat. since she's taking Leif to the tolo (this was the cookies at 9pm boy I wrote about earlier). Since I know she has $60 squirreled away in her wallet, she gets to pay for dinner and the tickets.

I think she was hoping I'd bankroll it, but no go. Unless of course, she gets to her dad before I do. Such a softy.

Monday, April 20, 2009

What did you just text?

That was what Jennifer was trying NOT to scream after her cousin (2 years older than her) snatched her cell phone after she took his.

So JJ started texting away, telling this one boy that Jennifer's had her eye on (won't admit it, and no it's not the one we made cookies for at 9pm) that she loved him.

Silence from the other end.

So Jennifer retaliated and texted the same thing to one of JJ's male friends.

Answer back: WTF dude?

JJ quickly rectified the situation, but Jennifer didn't here back from her guy for days.

He's the preening type, so I'm sure that he's thinking about whether Jennifer is telling the truth..or not.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Hello? Anyone home? Besides the kids?

Okay, to follow up on yesterday, J calls at around 9 pm and want me to pick her up in an east Kent suburb, the kind where you get lost in cul de sac hell, and yet, some marsh still survives somewhere, 'cause you can hear the frog still.

Finally find the house,and knock at the door. Knock again. And a sweet young girl, obv. the b-day girl whose party J tagged along on, opens it, and calls for J. Jennifer realizes that her backpack is still in the back of someone's car, so girl disappears to get the keys.

I notice the house is spotless, and two large pictures of Jesus are staring at me from the living room and foyer. No parent has emerged yet to see who is at the front door or to see I'm not herding all the girls into a van at gunpoint.

I do hear the father (I assume) snap at sweet young girl to "close the door!" to the upstairs bedroom, which she quickly does, and gets J's back pack.

J thanks her; I thank her. Still no parental units make themselves known.

Very odd. But this isn't the first time this has happened.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Yes, I need a phone ## and an adult needs to answer

Please, please, please, JEnnifer asked. Could she go with a friend to the mall, then to dinner and then to another friend's home for the b-day party. Not her friend Jackie's party, but a friend of Jackie, who said she could bring a friend.

Okay, yes, I guess you can go on this limo ride extravaganza, IF you get me this friend's ## and I talk to her mom. That was 3 days ago. I reminded her at t-minus 3, 2 and then yesterday. Either she gets me the ## or she doesn't go.

Sulk. Mad texting, then she hands me the number this morning b-4 school. Call said mystery mom, who doesn't sound like a drug dealer when her answering machine picks up. I ponder for moment, and figure, fine, I'll let her go, as long as she checks in throughout the evening. On the way to pick her up now.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

PDA and dealing with ex's new girlfriend

Around and around the parking lot we turned, practicing parallel parking and backing around corners (no idea why Jennifer needs to know this) for her driver's ed test this week (she passed). Barely.

Every time we turned the corner at Scene Hill Elementary, we lit up a couple leaning against their car, smooching.

"Bleech," says J., while trying to keep the car from going over the curb.

"I never realized how that looked when I was kissing d. at driver's ed," she grumbled. "PDA's are gross."

PDA? personal assistant? No, trying public displays of affection.

And there is apparently quite a bit of it going on between her ex, D, and his new girlfriend (not the cheerleader, with whom she is friends with now), but another girl, and cheerleader. Their PDAs are at school and apparently all over their MySpace pages.

And just today, J. gave me a "bitch alert" Apparently girlfriend #3 with ex, is spreading rumors that J has ugly teeth (her teeth are in fact toothpaste commercial straight).

"Honey, I would just say she's insecure and don't engage," I sighed as we pulled away from Auburn High School.

But if ex brings gf to the lunch table, you might want to show everyone your teeth.

She'll know she's been busted.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Good to know her heart is in the right place

Was coming home from Auburn today, and Jennifer noted that a box was on top of a car, with the same wrapping of boxes inside. Obv., they'd been loading the car and forgot about the last package.

Since it was raining up a storm, it was stuck to the top for a moment.

As I was mulling over whether we could get along side the blue Toyota, Jennifer said "oh, why do that, we're having so much fun watching it."

About that time the box fell off. Okay, so much for being the good samaritan.

Text or twitter?

My daughter is constantly on my case because I'm on my twitter account. However, I note she's always texting - walking eating, watching tv - texting.

She tried texting me today on my phone, and I couldnt' get the blasted thing to work (ie, reply back). Kept asking me if I wanted to delete the text. I finally called her, and told her where I was, and yes, she'd have to walk through the rain to get to me (door to door service was not in the offing, the buses were in the way).

So off she came.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Mom, stop grabbing the door!

Okay, I was actually steadying myself as Jennifer insisted taking the corner in 3rd gear again.

The concept of shifting down seems to be beyond her right now. But at least she isn't killing the car as much anymore. We went through the intersection from hell (read the earlier post) without a pause. Although she did try to park in the Target parking lot tonight (I told her I'd buy her a latte), sort of catywampus, taking up 2 slots near handicapped parking. (Ok NOT in the handicapped stall).

I straightened out the car, and into Target we went. We then inched our way out of the parking lot and onto the road. I realized why her driver's ed teacher wanted to have her practice backing up around corners, as she's lurching backwards out of the stall.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Enemies, to friendimies to friends

Odd how that happens sometimes.

Remember stalker, cheerleader, "you called me a slut, so I slam you on myspace" Well, she and J and now friends. Really.

After J's boyfriend dumped her (via text, yeah, I'm still holding a grudge on that), said ex started going out with cheerleader, stalker on text, myspace type. Then he dumped her, or actually, I think she broke up with him after finding out he was bragging to his buds on how far he intended to go with her (just short of sex I guess).

She's pissed. She started texting J. Now, they text back and forth quite a bit and chat at school. Guess who they are talking about?

Friday, April 3, 2009

Wanna friend me?

Uh no.

Jennifer noted how an old friend of hers was now on Facebook, her and 175 million others, and how she'd just posted some old soccer pics of the 2 from 5th grade.

"So, do you want to be on Facebook," I asked, figuring that the permissions might make it past Gary's sniff test.

"Why would I want that," she said. "Devi is the only on Facebook."

"I could friend you," I said, trying to be helpful.

"Why would I want to chat with you?"

Okay, never mind.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

I think she's got it

After last time's stressful drive, we ventured out again on Sunday, and then again last night. On Sunday, I learned the way to get Jennifer to drive, without killing the car, through an intersection, was to give her a goal.

In this case, TJ Maxx. If she made it there, without intervention, I'd buy her something. If not, do deal. We made it through 2 of the most heavily travelled intersections in Kent with nary a murmur (or popped clutch). She drove back too.

Last night was freeway driving. She was going to do a drive, today, so she wanted to practice last night. She made it through the intersections without killing the car as long as the station was tuned to 106.1 (KISS FM). The music seemed to make her forget about focusing on that damn clutch so much.

Once we got to 167, she started to panic. I told her to let the traffic go around her, get to 4th gear and then 5th (she tried to put it in 3rd, poor Honda didn't like that) and away we went, at 54 mph. Okay, not quite 60, but fortunately we were behind a van that was poking along, so we just stayed at that grandma speed and got used to the freeway. We went home on the west valley highway, 2-lane narrow road.

Made it home without a hitch. Thank gawd.